We got a pleasant surprise in the mail yesterday, in the form of a bottle of Akvinta Vodka, a brand we hadn't heard of before, but bills itself as the world's "first luxury Mediterranean vodka." The stuff is made of Italian wheat and Dalmatian water, and is triple-distilled and filtered through birch, marble, silver, gold, and platinum. According to the Akvinta website:
Akvinta has a light lemon citrus nose with a touch of sweetness, a light peppery mouth feel, and very smooth finish with no burn. It is luxurious and well- balanced when drunk on its own, in mixed drinks or simply served over ice; and it works wonderfully in all cocktails especially those with citrus and fruit ingredients.
Sounds good to us, and we'll get that review posted ASAP.
A while back, we introduced you to the McNuggetini, an assplodingly horrible idea for a cocktail. "But wait," you're probably saying to yourself. "I remember this McNuggetini story, but I ignored it since it was not in video form!"
Fret not, dear readers, for we offer you the McNuggetini in full, Technicolor, motion picture glory! You'll thrill at the barbecue sauce-rimmed cocktail glass! You'll swoon as vanilla vodka and chocolate shakes are combined in a cocktail shaker! You'll gag as you watch the look on their faces as the ladies take that first nauseating sip! All we can say is they'd better deliver that ham daiquiri they promise at the end of the video...
We're not exactly sure why we're including this as a Physical Challenge, because we don't recommend anyone do it unless they are A) a member of or B) a roadie for Cephalic Carnage, the band that came up with it, according to Drunkist...apparently they read the whole article that went with the video. Oh well, we're not the types to get weededed anyway. And another thing...wait, man...what were we saying?
Anyway, just get out your vaporizers and crackers or whatever and watch the video. It's pretty intense...like The Strikeout from Beerfest if you got mystically transported into a Cannibal Corpse album. On a side note, is it just us or does Weed Vodka sound like it would taste like Satan's bunghole?
For those of you who don't know Olivia Munn is the co-host of G4's Attack of the Show, and she is funny as Hell and hot as Hades. We don't know how we missed this last year, but we've just dug up a vodka tasting she did in November 08. There seems to be a lot of shots of her A) posing with the bottle and B) spitting vodka back into a cup, then C) ripping on it. Check out our favorite lines below, and hit the video (as well as some more serious reviews of how "chick friendly" the vodkas are) after the jump.
Oh, and also, we realize the Princess Leia pic was completely gratuitous since we're posting video, but it was too awesome NOT to. Don't you agree?
"It smells like Tito's hands."
"It smells like a 12 year old girl's chapstick."
"I don't know why they call it Los Angeles...maybe because it's a little douchey?"
"How much would you have to give a 14 year old girl to get what you need?'"
"It looks like a cherry that's been nutted on."
Sometimes we get a liquor in to review that feels...well, it just feels too classy for us. You know, like we're the only guys in shorts and flip flops who show up at a black tie affair. Belvedere's Black Raspberry vodka is one of those bottles - we feel like we should handle the bottle with white gloves so we don't smudge the finish.
Then we remember Belvedere puts their pants on one leg at a time, and we crack the bottle and get to sipping.
Some of our favorite memories involve lounging about on our plantation, fanning ourselves and drinking sweet tea while complaining about The Union. Oh, wait...that's not our memories. That's Scarlett O'Hara's. We get confused sometimes.
But if we ever wanted to tie on a good buzz while we did that, we're pretty sure we'd turn to Jeremiah Weed's Sweet Tea-flavored vodka. It's got sweet tea, it's got vodka, it's got Jeremiah Weed. How can you go wrong?
We've been looking forward to reviewing Oval Vodka ever since we got the bottle a little bit ago. We've finally had time to sit down and give it the look-see (and smell-taste) it deserves, and we're excited to share the results. Ever since we heard about the 11 day "structuring" process Oval goes through, we've been excited about giving it a go - after all, who makes a vodka with a proof as strange as 84 unless there's a damned good reason? Find out why after the jump.
We've gotten our grubby little paws on a bottle of Belvedere Black Raspberry vodka, just in time for the weekend. Expect our breath to smell of raspberries, but possibly not in a good way, come Monday. We're so excited about the bottle, we're thinking about doing a little maceration of our own, if you know what we mean.
We have a confession to make - we've never had elderflower liqueur. It's not that we have a problem with drinking flowers, it's more like we just haven't had an opportunity. We dug up this good-looking springtime recipe featuring Oval Vodka, and it seems like a good reason to get out there and snatch up a bottle of St. Germain.
Check out the recipe below, and don't hesitate to whip up a batch in honor of Earth Day.
We've had good and bad experiences with flavored vodkas in the past, but one that's got our attention right now is Belvedere's Black Raspberry. A combination of blackberries and currants, this is another macerated vodka to join the company's line of other flavored vodkas, Citrus and Orange. Their flavored vodkas are macerated and they're focusing their campaign around what that word sounds like.
We're guessing they won't want to associate their brand with going blind, but maybe a few good hairy palm jokes, or maybe someone getting caught macerating by their spouse? Good times, good times.
The Maceration Is Natural site isn't up yet, but keep an eye out for more information there in coming weeks.