November 9, 2005

Jesus Juice Wine: Not Just For Kids

We Americans don't really ask much from our celebrities. All we really want is to be able to trust them implicitly when we send our kids to their massive and creepy ranches for a sleep over. For a brief time, we thought we weren't going to be able to trust Michael Jackson with our young'uns anymore, but luckily he was let off the hook for that whole pederast thing. But just when Jacko thought he could breathe a sigh of relief, here comes Jesus Juice wine.

The wine, which bears a label featuring a Jackson-like man in a Christ-like pose wearing a sequined glove, was trademarked by an actress and the producer of CBS Evening News coverage of Jackson's trial.

Westlake and Rheins filed to trademark the "Jesus Juice" name in January 2004, two months after the entertainer was arrested and days after news outlets first reported that Jackson used the term "Jesus Juice" when referring to wine he allegedly gave minors. On October 1, Westlake and Rheins provided USPTO officials--who are still reviewing the trademark application--with a copy of the proposed "Jesus Juice" logo, which features a photo of a barely clad man with a sequined glove, shiny loafers, stringy hair, and a black fedora that obscures his face. While carrying the name "Rheins-Westlake Winery," it appears that the wannabe winemakers's merlot production has, so far, been rather limited. In fact, two Westlake web sites seek a partner (preferably "a vintner with a sense of humor, but a seriously good line of wines") or someone to purchase the "Jesus Juice" trademark rights.

We're not sure if it'll ever be made, but can you imagine what an amazing conversation piece it would be if you served it with dinner.That's assuming that everyone at the table was over 21, of course.

Read more about Jesus Juice wine at the Smoking Gun.

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